Tsk, Tsk!

I have been horrible about getting on and writing. It's all for good reasons though! I have been keeping busy with exercise and playing outside. I have been tackling major tasks around my house that I just didn't have the energy for before . And I have been reading. I used to love to curl up with a book, so I just decided to do it again. I can get so lost in a book. It's my escape. I love when I can find a book I can totally realte to then I just climb inside and be the book.
How has this effected my journey? I feel I have been raised to a new level! I am down to an even 200 lbs. My BMI has dropped from Obese to Overweight and I ordered a size 16 dress for a wedding that I am going to be in! When we originally went to try on dresses, they largest sample they had was an 18. I couldn't get it over my hips. Yesterday, I took the 18 into the fitting room and it was falling down! I asked for the 16 and it didn't zip all the way but I still have 3 months to work on that!
People that I come across on a regular basis are relly noticing the difference which gives me a little boost to keep it going. Almost 8 months in, I am down 64 lbs!

BBQ Season

I love BBQ season! I love to spend the day outside working in the yard, then chop of some veggies and toss them on the grill. Corn in the husk cooked on the grill, mixed pepper and zucchini with some pepper and a tiny bit of spray in the wok on the grill. I could live off that! Sometimes I plan in advance and marinate some chicken all day and toss that on too.
I have always thought that I hated yard work but have recently discovered I enjoy it. I changed the way I look at it and that makes it completely different. To pull weeds, I can do some twists or squats. Pushing the lawnmower (for 2+hours) is great cardio not to mention some arm strength since I can adjust the self propel speed. When it is all done, I can look out and see the beauty of the yard and I can say "I did that!" And the garden.....I love having a garden. I can see my garden from my kitchen window. I usually decide what I am cooking when I am doing dishes, so that means I am looking out the kitchen window. While I haven't had anything grow yet, last year, I would spend so much time making thing with zucchini. I think my yard is zucchini breading ground! I love having a rainbow meal that I know has all grown in my yard!
So, speaking of the grill and BBQs, what are some things I am going to avoid.......I am going to skip over the heavy salads. I will look for greens. I will find the veggies and fruit. I will say no to bread and buns. If I find myself attending, I will bring my boca burger and ask if they can toss it on the grill. That way, I am sure that I will have something to eat to avoid snacking too much. Plus, I will offer to bring a healthy dish that I know I can eat. And I will keep drinking water! It is more refreshing then any other drink and I know it is keeping my system clean.
Now for the weight update.....I got on the scale Thursday. I was very excited when I saw 211! I'm down 53 lbs. On another note, I had to buy a couple pairs of shorts for the summer. I just could make do anymore. I bought a size 18! I was in 22/24 so this really shows me that I have lost. I also got to the point that I had to replace bras. Did you know that wearing the right size bra can bring you down 1 size shirt? I didn't! So I went to a store that actually worked with me and did a fitting. When the employee went out to find me some bras, she brought back in 2 shirts. I kind of giggled that she brought in a size 14/16. But, one I put on the bra, I put on the shirt and it fit!!!! Needless to say, even though I didn't intend to, I bought the shirt.

It's been a while

It has been a while since I updated. I have not been in the best place with myself lately. One of my dogs, Mocha, passed on 5/21. I struggled with the idea of having her euthenized and even made the appointment. I talked with my kids and some family came by to say their goodbyes to her. She passed on her own at home between 6:30 and 6:45 am. She nudged me and I petted her then her her let out a big breath and that was it. I denied it until I got the kids ready, then I told them that she had passed in her sleep. They are handling it well; I am not.



Before that, I had been thinking about what I want to do with my life. I am trying to focus on that now. I want to find my purpose. My children are a great part of that, but I feel like there is more and I am searching for it. I wish purpose would just drop itself on me and become known easily. I have a few ideas that I am going back and forth on but have not made a decision.



I missed a couple weigh ins since I didn't update. I am down 49.5 lbs total. I really want to hit 50 already! I was at a stand still this week but am glad I didn't gain. I need to remain in control of my eating no matter what is going on in my life. I have to control food. I can't let it control me.

Just another Maniac Monday

Remember that song, Just another Maniac Monday? I work all weekend. Friday I work just in the evening, then Saturdays from 3 until 11pm and same on Sunday. When Monday morning rolls around and I have to get my oldest out of bed, ready and out to the bus by 7:40 am. That may not be early to some but I usually don't get to sleep until 1 or so after getting off work at 11pm. Anyway, I tend to drag all day on Monday. Today was no different. My youngest is sick, so I couldn't hit the gym when I usually do since I won't put her in childcare when she is sick. That puts me doing my workout after the kids are in bed. Tonight I will be doing a power walk/running intervals in my neighborhood. I am shooting for 1 1/2 hours. I usually so a little more on Mondays since I weigh in on Tuesdays. I did some odd weight exercises at home this afternoon. I did some core type exercises as well.
Why is it that holidays and celebrations revolve around food? For mother's day yesterday, my husband bought a large cookie cake and ice cream. I couldn't disappoint the kids by not eating it, so I had a small piece and asked that it be gone when I get home from work. It wasn't. I have been nibbling on it today and feel horrible for it. I haven't touched the ice cream because I know that will be gone as soon as I open it. Tonight I need to talk to my husband about how food like that is just not good to be around me right now. If he had bought strawberries and whip cream, that would have been so much better and I wouldn't have pigged out on it but it would have been a treat. (Don't get me wrong, in the past, I would have loved the cake but I am working to break old habits and I don't have a healthy relationship with food right now.)
That brings me to another point. Support. It's so important to have support to succeed. My support comes from friends and online groups. I have someone to report to weekly with online groups. It keeps me on track because I don't want to report a gain. I also have to be in a wedding in October, so that keeps me on track. I know I will not look good in the dress at the size I am now. I won't be to my goal at that point, but I will have make it a long way already and that will make me feel good about myself.

Start of a new Journey

I live near a forest preserve and it seems that every Saturday morning is booming with activity of many charitable benefit walks. Spring is in the air and the walks have started. Today I am walking 5 miles for Children's Miracle Network. This is the start of a new goal. By September, I want to be able to RUN. I am going to do interval training to get to this point. I will rotate walking and running in short intervals lengthening the running portion on a regular basis. For this, I have bought a good sports bra made of steel and I some tank tops to keep the rest in place. That brings me to a whole new point.
In all the weight fluctuation, pregnancies, and just plain being a large woman, I have extra skin that won't bounce back. Finding exercise clothes in plus sizes has been difficult. Sports bras for well endowed women are hard to come by as well. Seriously, I have gone into sports stores, running stores, and even called many other stores that carry sports bras and these employees are like a deer in headlights when I tell them my size. Immediately their stare shifts from my face to my chest. People pay big money to have breasts my size and I don't want them! I don't understand how people can choose this. Anyway, beast reduction is on my list but I want to lose weight first. People keep telling me that I will lose weight in the chest but I was large-chested prior to being fat, so that is just the way that I am .

Today's Food journal:
Breakfast:

• Coffee (90)
• 113 g. Cottage cheese (90)
• 1 slice of toast with Brummal and Brown Spread (55)

Lunch:

• Rice Cakes (90)
• Tomatoes (10)
• Cheese (50)

Dinner :

• Chicken (200)
• Fries (150)
• Peas (45)

Snacks:

• Pria Bar (110)
• Rice Krispie Treat (100)
• Banana (100)

Total calories: 1090
Water: 120 ozs
Pedometer for today: 22050 steps, 20.86 miles, 1456 calories

The Plan

I am not following a set structured plan. I read nutritional labels to be sure things are lower in fat, have dietary fiber, and measure out portion sizes, which makes me really think about what I am putting in my body. On average, I try to limit myself to less than 1700 calories. I do vary the actually number day to day to keep my body from setting into a pattern. I drink about 100 ozs of water daily. (I don't drink any soda but do have 1 cup of coffee each morning.)
For exercise, I average 1 1/2 hours 5 days a week. Sometimes it is 6 days and sometimes it is 2 hours. I spend time on the elliptical and bike and do some weight lifting. I do random exercise
with small weights at home too and sit on the exercise ball to work on my posture. The straighter I stand, the thinner I look. My kids like to copy that and each have a smaller play ball that they sit on while I am sitting on my exercise ball. I really need to look up some core exercises because my core needs major work.

Also, I have found ways to make day to day things and things I do with my kids exercises as well. We like to set up bases in the backyard and run them, playing tag, even pushing the kids in the swing can be exercise. (Every once in a while, I would stop them and 'lift' the swing with them in it. I sure felt that the next day and the kids didn't have a clue what I was doing, they just enjoyed it!) I wear a pedometer daily as well and track that. Right now, I am seeing how many weeks it takes to walk 500 miles. I'm over 200 miles in 2 1/2 weeks.

I have found the more active I am in the day, the more energy I have altogether. If I feel muscles I haven't used, I want to feel them more. I am loving the way I feel. I used to use being fat as an excuse not to do something but now I just think like I am already thin and it makes a huge difference in me. Plus, by making healthy decisions, I am getting the result I focused on for so long! The weight is coming off.

Food Journal
Today's breakfast:

• Coffee (90 calories because of sugar, milk and Benefiber)
• 1/2 c All Whites egg substitutes (60 calories)
• 1/8 c shredded cheese-in the eggs (50 calories)
• 1 oz diced tomatoes-also in the eggs (5 calories)
• 24 grams roasted salted sunflower seeds (140 calories)

Lunch:

• Sandwich (Bread, mustard, yogurt veggie cheese and chicken- 160 calories)
• 3 pickles (5 calories)
• Banana (100 calories)
• Cheese (60 calories)
• Chocolate (330 calories)- this was a very bad, emotion choice
  

Dinner:

• 1/4 c rice (100)
• Veggies in oil (85)
• 2 oz Chicken breast (130)
• Salad (64)
• Bread w/ garlic spread (150)
• Grapefruit juice (110)
  

Total: 1639
Water: 72 ozs
Exercise: Walked outside, 1.5 miles.
Pedometer reading: 4410 steps, 4.17 miles, 291 calories burned

The Journey thus far

So the last post was about my decision to venture down the weight loss journey. I was reflecting back on the beginning of the year. I just now decided to blog it. I think it will be a good way for me to put my thoughts and journey into perspective for myself. I journal my food intake, I journal my weight loss but usually, I am the only one that sees those. I do participate in a couple weight loss challenges and groups but I want to open it up here.

So a little over 4 months have passed since I decided to focus on my health and with that, obtaining a new body in a healthy way. My progress is very good. I struggled with exercise at first. I would go to the gym and do a little cardio. I didn't really push myself. When I felt tired or wanted to change, I would. Then I realized, who am I cheating here? No one is watching me but me. Who am I doing this for? ME! So I am cheating my self by not pushing.

I got that straightened out. I started writing down what I did each trip to the gym. I made goals of what I would do each week at the gym. I stuck to it. As long as I was healthy and my kids were healthy, we were there. There were times I couldn't take my kids to childcare, so I went at night, late, after my husband got home. As I started seeing results, I pushed myself more. In January, I made a goal to hit the gym for 45 minutes 3 days a week. It's May now and I got 5-6 days a week for 1 1/2-2 hours 5 days a week. Some days I do more.

So where do I stand now? How have I progressed from January until now?
217.5 lbs. I am down 46.5 lbs.
I am very pleased to be seeing results and can't wait to share my continued journey with you!