It has been a while since I updated. I have not been in the best place with myself lately. One of my dogs, Mocha, passed on 5/21. I struggled with the idea of having her euthenized and even made the appointment. I talked with my kids and some family came by to say their goodbyes to her. She passed on her own at home between 6:30 and 6:45 am. She nudged me and I petted her then her her let out a big breath and that was it. I denied it until I got the kids ready, then I told them that she had passed in her sleep. They are handling it well; I am not.
Before that, I had been thinking about what I want to do with my life. I am trying to focus on that now. I want to find my purpose. My children are a great part of that, but I feel like there is more and I am searching for it. I wish purpose would just drop itself on me and become known easily. I have a few ideas that I am going back and forth on but have not made a decision.
I missed a couple weigh ins since I didn't update. I am down 49.5 lbs total. I really want to hit 50 already! I was at a stand still this week but am glad I didn't gain. I need to remain in control of my eating no matter what is going on in my life. I have to control food. I can't let it control me.
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